Boy is it hard! Worth every second but hard!
I've had days where my boy has cried and cried and I have cried with him cause I didn't know what he wanted. I was trying everything and nothing was comforting him. And it killed me cause I just want to take good care of him in everything.
James has been so wonderful. He comes home from work, tired and needing to rest and all he wants is a kiss and to hold his baby. He also keeps his eye out for anything that he thinks will be beneficial to him when he's older. He was listening to KBAQ and Tubby the Tuba came on and he called me asking me to write it down so we could get it. He's so excited to teach his son so many things.
And I'm so thankful to have him. My baby is going to learn so many wonderful things from James. He'll learn about history and baseball, he'll learn to research everything and not just take things at face value.
Also, things will be looking up. James had bought a DVD for us called Dunstan Baby Language and we just watched it today. It was amazing! The lady who put this together, Priscilla Dunstan, was so uncomfortable in the DVD but she gives you examples of the different cries babies make and what those mean. Oh it was so helpful! I love it!!
It's been a little lonely. I don't have a car right now and won't until I get my tax refund. So I've been kinda stuck here. But I've at least had the energy at times to clean and do laundry and that makes me happy. I like having the energy to do things again.
I don't look forward to looking for a job. I hate the idea of leaving my baby. He's so beautiful and wonderful and I don't want to miss a moment! It was terrible leaving him just for a few hours. We'll see what happens though. Everything will work out for the best. I know that.
I have James and our baby. Everything will work out the way it needs to so that the best thing will happen for my son.